Shut Up, Charlize Theron

2-24-13: “It’s the most freeing thing,” [Charlize] Theron told Ryan Seacrest on the red carpet at the Hollywood & Highland Center in California. “I highly recommend it.”

Dear Charlize: When you “choose” to shave your head because it’s freaking you out too much that you are able to and compelled to, every minute, every hour, every day, pull your shiny, healthy, thick, long feminine hair out by the handful…then please get back to us and let us know how highly you recommend it.

Oh and we mean you’re pulling out your hair/shaving your head not because you’re getting paid a bazillion dollars to do so for a role in a Hollywood production—-knowing your beautiful healthy mane will grow back into that sexy, brave pixy style in just a short three months time.

Let us know how “freeing” we’ll feel after we shave our heads and are so damn cold even in the heat of summer that we have to wear special caps and hats indoors. And to bed. And under a scarf. Or under irritating, expensive wigs that we hate and wouldn’t wear except on the occasions that society calls for them lest we be perceived as even more of a pitiful, awkward freak than we already are.

So Charlize? Do every breast cancer/chemo patient a favor: Think before you speak. And every time you pay 100’s and 1000’s of dollars towards styling your lovely new, healthy mane, think maybe…just maybe….how you can divert a few of those dollars to better the lives of your fellow females who would give anything—-we mean just about anything—to CHOOSE to shave our heads…let alone find it “freeing” and “highly recommend it” to another woman.

Well ladies, are you ready to shave your head and see how free you feel?


How ’bout now?

3 thoughts on “Shut Up, Charlize Theron

  1. For me it was the moment I found out I’d lose my hair. Made it real, and so much bigger than me, the me who had great hair. An identity issue and loss of control to the C word. I cried in the arms of my surgeon who then took out his cell phone to call the oncologist. Cried the day of head shaving too, but at least had caring friends and good wine (a gift from a smart friend) with me. :/


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